Me: interesting doesn't keep you warm at night, honey. Space heaters do...

Sarah: no they don't, they just give you a bloody nose.

Adam Little

I gotta make like Joan and Jett.


Totally just invented that. So proud.

Brian Kelly

Roommate says he's headed to the gyro place on the corner. 
Me: "Isn't that an Azerbaijani joint?"
Him: "It could be a Spike Lee joint, for all I know."