Aaron: shit got weird in the best way last night
i think there were six topless chicks in my room til like 7am
what the fuck am i supposed to do for my birthday if that's just what happens on a random saturday?

me: whoa. why were they topless?
were you giving away free mammograms again?

"May you fertilize your crops with the ashes of your enemies." -Deanna's toast

"That's what I get for buying a book at Urban Outfitters." - Robbie

"Beer can... Oh!"- Robbie

Style-arisma- new word by Eric

Tomato, tadildo...-Ana

I never quote myself!

"I wish I knew how to hit- and- quit you." -me

"Musicians. It's like an accent, times two." -Eric

"So Kevin Sorbo told a really funny joke earlier." - Eric

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Totes? Totes mcgoats. Oh, totally goatily? - Dad trying to be hip

The older I get, the more of my neuroses are confirmed. -Eric

Dad: "What's the equivalent of a cock tease? (for lesbians) Twat tease?" Mom: cuntease?

Pop culture conspiracy

Ana: beyonce's fake baby is probably hanging out with gaga's dick right now

Had I been a girl I'd be so pretty... - guy working at All Saints

Emily on Omaha

Omaha-
"What is that, is that a place?"

Josh's new work song

"If you don't blow me right now...
you will never see your fuckin' family..."

That's why I just call it a hot. Like you're not just a hot mess, you're like just a hot. Random drunk hipster

Only Adam

Adam Little: Ooooh! I have the best drama!
Me: Oh yeah? Dish, girlfriend!
Adam: Short version: stalker-ish neighbor has been writing about me on facebook for months.
Me: Ummmmm
Adam: In Chinese.
Me: The fuck
Adam: She's never heard of a little thing called "browser plugins".

Brainstorming

Ana: make a fashion vid like LADY GAGA
me: lol
Ana: with an asian girl puking on you slo-mo
me: with a stutter edit, like in Videophone?
flashing strobe effects?
Ana: exactly. we're so brilliant.

Onomatopeia? You watch your mouth, young lady! - Jam

Josh, on the bitches who shop at Whole Foods:
"your only marketable skill is you take rich dick."

Josh, to me: you've got a cute face, and a real nice attitude.

My Cheerleaders

Two young men standing on the corner see me booking it for the train station.

"GET IT, GIRL!"
"Earn that money!"

:D

Robbie: Uh, yeah!
like no doy, erin

me: like no doy.
i cannot tell you the last time i heard that.
thank you.

Robbie: oh, c'mon. you can tell me.

me: you have triggered a cascade of flashbacks
including The Noid, and "psike!"

Robbie: avoid the Noid!